SURVIVOR ~ Breast Cancer Stage IV

In 1989 I was diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer and had a partial mastectomy, chemo and radiation. I was in law school at the time, and even though my doc advised me to take some time off, I just was not ready to. But, I did find a wonderful therapist -- when I heard the word "cancer" I thought I would be dead soon, and I did not want to die with all of the neuroses sitting on my back that I had lived with. When I walked in to see my therapist, Deepesh Faucheaux, I told him that I considered cancer an external manifestation of an internal disintegrity. We went to work, and it was hard but the best thing I've ever done. At the time I was 35. Things looked great after my treatment, therapy, and landing a job with the State of Colorado. I met my husband at the attorney general's office, while I was just completing my chemo. I had very thin hair at the time, and he just thought I had a cute "punk" haircut. We were married in 1992.

In 1994, I had a recurrent breast cancer in the same breast, and underwent a completion mastectomy, but nothing else was offered. No one talked to me about diet, physical exercise or activity, or any holistic opportunities. That seemed strange to me, but I guess everyone thought that this time the cancer was just "leftover" from the first episode in 1989.

I was perking along, feeling pretty darn good -- I had survived 12 years from my first diagnosis with metastatic breast cancer. Then, last year in May, my doc found breast cancer cells on my cervix during a routine pap smear. But, it couldn't be -- breast cancer doesn't usually go to the uterus or cervix. As it turned out, I think I was pretty lucky. After rounds and rounds of tests, roller coaster rides that lasted 2 months, we found the cancer in my bones and throughout my abdomen. Just a few cells had worked their way through my uterine wall to give me a heads up. I'm on Aredia and Arimidex, and I'm going to a holistic physician and an alternative healer. Right now, all of my blood work, the alk phos and cancer markers, are in the normal range. My diet is an important aspect of my life, and am careful about what I eat -- it gives me energy. I also take several Chinese and homeopathic remedies, and take 400 mg. of CoQ-10 a day. I retired from working as an environmental attorney with the State and spend my days exploring the sacred world around me and in me. (Retiring wasn't easy, but after a period of adjustment, I'm having a good time.) My husband and I backpacked the Grand Canyon, North Rim to the Colorado River, last October. I hike mountains, ride my bike, and run with my beautiful siberian husky. This September we're going backpacking in Norway, and all over Colorado this summer. I'm also taking art lessons, and doing activities that engage my right brain -- my work required left brain only, and so when I stopped I felt pretty foggy until I began engaging the right brain. I'm also on a volunteer state environmental board and local planning commission.

I plan to be around for the next 20-30 years. I know there are other Stage IV Breast Cancer survivors out there who have survived that long too. They need to speak out more, help others have hope. Cuz I'll tell you, the western docs sure don't want us to get our hopes up. The first cancer doctor I went to after this latest time at bat with cancer told me she was sorry to have to tell me this, "but you will probably be dead in 24-36 months." Patients can have a way of living down to their doctors' prognoses, so I think it should be a crime for a doctor to even say such a thing. It's neurolinguistic programming of the most dangerous kind. The next doctor I went to (of course, I did not stay with the first one) was GREAT!!! He told me about patients of his that were still around with Stage IV after 19-20 years. Maybe I will, maybe I won't, be one of them. But now I know it's possible and I can set my sights on that goal. My insurance company then yanked its coverage of this wonderful doctor, so I am now going to a breast cancer specialist who is slowly coming around to my way of thinking. In the meantime, every day of my life is wonderful, I have fallen in love my husband all over again (and he with me), I have the most incredible support group of friends and family, and I have my health and strong body (believe it or not, I can say that). I look around and see so many people whose illnesses keep them from being active or happy, and others who die in car or airplane crashes without a chance to say goodbye to their loved ones. So, I live my life with gratitude and joy, and experience the sacred in the world every day. I would very much like to hear from long-term survivors of Stage IV cancers

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