Ana

Breast cancer has touched my young life twice. I am not a stage IV yet, but I was so moved and encouraged by these stories that I just had to add mine to this website. I want to help reach out to others any way I can. I sent a short story here before, but was not satisfied with the way it turned out, so here I am once again writing it with alot more detail.

I was only 26 yrs. old when I found the lump on Oct. 1, 1991. I was getting ready to take a shower & had to scratch an itch on my right armpit when my palm felt a bump on my chest, just below my clavicle bone. I kept touching it, in disbelief, because I had just watched a Jenny Jones or Sally Jesse show and it was about breast cancer! And to top it off, they said that October was breast cancer awareness month! I had never even been concerned about it, although I find it ironic that 6 months before I found this lump, I had been taught for the first time how to do self breast exams, and I did not do them. So, I took my shower and when I was done I immediately called the clinic that was near my house and I had been a patient there over the last 6 years. They made an appointment that afternoon, & when the doctor examined me she told me that she would refer me to the one and only female surgeon in Santa Rosa, CA at that time, Loie G. Sauer. I had a mammogram and an ultrasound done on Oct. 3, 1991. I asked the radiologist if my lump looked like it was solid or fluid filled, & she told me it looked solid! I knew from what I had read at the library that a solid lump is usually cancer, and when I left that x-ray room, I immediately started crying & it was the first time I was scared for my life!

I had only been married 5 years to the love of my life, we had a 4 year old son, & a 10 yr old daughter from a previous relationship. I did not want to leave them yet, & I decided then & there I would fight with all I had. When I saw Dr. Sauer on Oct. 5, 1991, she was quite sure that my lump was not cancerous, she said we will "watch it" & she would like to see me back in about a month. She did not do a needle biopsy in her office that day. Why, I don't know, maybe it was not the common thing to do back then. She also mentioned that I was "too young" to have breast cancer! We could not do any kind of surgery cause I had just been laid off work & had lost my insurance, so I had to apply for Medi-cal & that took 3 weeks to be approved.

Within that time, my lump got bigger & the biopsy was scheduled for Oct. 29, 1991. The next day at the doctor's office, my husband went with me in the exam room and we were told it was cancer! The Dr. said she would talk more with me and my family in her office, so she & my husband left the exam room and once again I was alone with my thoughts. As I walked down the hall towards the dr.'s office, I kept saying to myself, "I can't believe it! Cancer! I am too young!" I almost fainted in that hallway, but I kept thinking that I had to be strong for everyone else, my husband, kids, my mom & my ex-mother-in-law, they were all in the waiting room waiting for the results, ready to be there for me. They sat in that dr.'s office with me while Dr. Sauer told me that I had to have a mastectomy, the lump was too big. It was a 3 cm. tumor, no clear margins, and because of the small size of my breasts, she advised a mastectomy. Everyone was crying except me, I was telling my husband Eddy, "I am not going to die! You are not getting rid of me that easy yet! I will be around to Bitch and love you for 80 more years!" and with that, everyone seemed to settle down.

I was pretending to be strong, but I felt like I was in a fog. Dr. Sauer wanted me to have surgery the next day, but the surgery suites were packed for the next week, so they fit me in on Nov. 4, 1991 and the surgery was scheduled for 9 or 10 am. While I was in the hospital, I had an MRI, and a bone scan, and the oncologist Russell Hardy came to tell me the type of chemotherapy I would be getting. My husband was devastated when he heard I would lose my hair.

The results from the tests of the mastectomy were that I had Stage 2 Infiltrating Ductal carcinoma, 2 out of 27 nodes had cancer, (but my bones & other organs were clear), it had a high S-Phase of 7%, which I still don't totally understand, I think it means my cancer was very aggressive, & from all the charts I read, my cancer WAS very aggressive. Well, I survived the 7 rounds of chemo, I had to have Cytoxan, Adriamycin & 5FU. I had a port inserted before I had the second treatment & I am glad I had that port, it was so much easier than getting poked in the arm or hand.

Well, for 6 yrs & 11 months I was walking around with one breast, & was cancer free. On July 22, 1998 one week after my 33rd birthday, I felt the lump in my remaining left breast. I had a needle biopsy on Aug. 25th, & on August 28th '98, I was told it was cancer AGAIN, & on Friday Sept. 4th 1998, I had my second mastectomy. I did much better than the first mastectomy, and the chemo was easier. I had Cytoxan, Methotrexate, 5FU. When I finished that last chemo on March 30, 1999, I began my reconstruction in May 1999. I had my saline implants put in on Oct. 6, 1999, & I love them! My Mom refers to them as my "Girls!!" My "Girls" and I are doing just fine, 3 yrs later! I still get frightened that every pain is cancer, but I try to get involved when I can, like Race for the Cure, or at the hospital's Cancer Center at St. Josephs in Stockton, CA. I also love to keep in contact on the internet with other survivors. I keep up my visits every 4 months with Dr. Dighe in Stockton . . . he is a very kind, sweet man!

So far, so good. I AM STILL HERE! It seems though, that I started a trend in my family. My mother Pam, was Dx only 1 yr. after me in 1992, and then again in 1999. But she is doing great now. My aunt Becky also was Dx in the summer of 2000, and thank the Lord she also is surviving. Sadly, just 2 weeks ago, my aunt Frances was Dx with Ovarian Cancer & she is having surgery on March 28, 2002 at UCSF. Please keep her in your prayers. I have written much more than I ever intended to, but I only hope that it helps & encourages other women, & I hope to hear from some of you out there soon. Thank You for having this website and God Bless those of you who are ahead of the rest of us.

Ana

Stories

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